The inner guru

November 24, 2008 at 11:45 am | Posted in The journey within | Leave a comment

I’m exhausted for these days, and not sure why, and i end up sleeping together with little boy all the way till next morning 8 am. Well, i actually get up at about 7 am and kinda laze in bed until little boy wakes up, which is 8 am. Maybe i really need to get some exercise into my routine to get the blood moving more quickly, and hopefully reduce the tummy bulge too!

Woke up in the middle of the night and feeling very thirsty. Mr Gua Gua was just coming to bed (he likes to fall asleep outside and sleepwalk his way in sometime ard 3- 4 am, so we really hardly get to see each other after he says goodnight to little boy), and once again, i was asking him how come you didn’t wake me up as promised! As usual, he said he fell asleep too… oh well… anyway, i had to get out of bed to hang up the laundy since i would have to rush little boy to school early in the morning. By the time that was done, lo and behold, i was too wide awake to go back to dreamland, so i decided to do some meditation, which i haven’t done in eons and judging from my mood swings of late, was sorely needed.

It was a surprisingly good session. Felt myself going very deeply, and connected to my heart. It’s nice to know that there’s really something there, and not just a hollow emptiness. I tot perhaps i wld have a little dialogue with my heart, see if it has any advice for me. At first i was hearing a hyper excited voice that sounded like it couldn;t wait to shoot me with a whole list of cliche advice… and i started wondering, if it was my ego in disguise. So i waited a little while more, dropping that voice a hint that i’m listening with a pinch of salt. It quieted down, and after moments of silence, i heard a quiet gentle voice speak, at a much slower pace, and i felt that this sounded more like my heart, my inner guru. I only remember bits and pieces unfortunately… somthing about being still, and trusting myself. Perhaps it was not so much what was said that was helpful, but the sense of acceptance and understanding i felt from it. It’s reassuring to know that despite all the “misbehaviours” and losses of control in the past week or so, there is a part of me that really does understand, and believes that i was just experiencing “temporary insanity”, and yes, that too shall pass.

It was just a short visit, before my mind wandered to other more mundane things, but feeling refreshed, i even had a couple of insights about the upcoming EFT presentation to a particular FSC. In fact i just gave a EFT Level I training to the staff of an international school yesterday. It was a small group, and just a single session instead of my usual two-session, so i will be doing a repeat “performance” today since it’s a special training that will combine Level I and a bit of Level II. Yesterday’s session was really good. I forgot to bring my checklist of things to present, but as it turns out, that freed me from following a standard protocol. In my past experience, having things to refer to just prevents me from connecting with myself and to the audience, so perhaps i will forget about bringing checklists from now on, since i know mostly everything by heart.

Having a small group whereby participants know each other has its advantages and disadvantages. Advantages are that there are fewer names to remember, and it becomes a more intimate and cozy kind of sharing, plus i can ensure that everyone can experience the effects of EFT at least once by the end of the session. Disadvantage is that cos pple know one another, there is less respect given to volunteers during demos, and they also tend to talk amongst one another more. So for today’s session, i shall lay the ground rule of confidentiality and showing respect to volunteers by staying quiet, and as for the talking, well i shall just be super engaging and go on with my presentation, so they will have to listen to me if they don’t wanna miss out!

Anyway, the insight i got from my meditation is that it’s not how much i say, but my presence, that will determine the impact of the workshop on the participants. I think sometimes my wish to cover as much as i can leads to me talking too fast, and being impatient to answer questions even before the questioner finishes his or her question. But upon reflection, whenever i attend talks of any kind, often i only remember a very very small amount, and it’s the part that was most moving and meaningful to me, which comes from the speaker’s conviction and connectedness to the audience.

For e.g., i remember being awed and inspired by Dr Emoto’s talk couple years ago, but the only words i actually recall, is his revelation that the only reason why he travels all over the world to share his work on the amazing water crystals, is because he wants to make the world a better place for his grandson to live in.

His honesty, his love for his grandson, and my own love for little boy imprinted those words into my mind, and i would probably never forget them for as long as i live.

Sadly, i don’t remember most of what my teachers taught in school, and even in workshops and seminars that i attend of my choosing.

So i remind myself to speak with love, passion and sincerity today, and for all my workshops, and may all participants of my workshop come away not only with EFT, but also a feeling of being inspired, empowered, and perhaps even a new way of looking at the world.

I’m actually very proud of the way i packaged my EFT Level I workshop, and after doing it so many times, i don’t think there is a need to change it, especially the thought experiment, muscle testing and display of Dr Emoto’s work. Yesterday, the participants’ amazement and excitement was especially evident, perhaps because of the small group size and familiarity with one another, and hearing their half-kidding, half-serious suggestions about how they could apply their findings in their everyday life made me realise that i am actually doing a part to raise people’s consciousness. There are still so many who do not realise how we are affected by energy, and even thoughts and words are energy, so it’s not just EFT that i’m sharing, but a new paradigm altogether. I feel so proud of the work that i’m doing, and grateful to the universe for the opportunity to do it.

I’m especially excited about today’s presentation cos i have actually manifested more than a year ago to train other helping professionals in EFT, and that to me was something pretty BIG (of cos, that was exactly why i manifested for it… if you dream, you might as well dream big right!). And my manifestation comes true today, finally! Even though i’m the one who offered to give the training in return for my aunt’s sponsorship for my Steve Wells’ seminar, i don’t quite care because i just want to get the chance to share EFT with peers in the same field. This is just the beginning!

So today, i’m going to give it my all, and may Green Tara and all other higher beings who have been supporting and guiding me, and of cos the universe, help to facilitate today’s session, so that it’s going to be transformational for all present. Gonna rem Gary’s words, to let it come through me and not by me… time now is 11:41 pm, and that means universe is giving me a resounding YESSS!

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