A new project for little boy

July 22, 2013 at 12:27 am | Posted in All about little boy, All about little girl, Rantings and ravings | Leave a comment

After blogging about how I should commemorate little girl’s first year (when she comes that is!), I got down to doing research on baby’s first year commemoration projects, and I stumbled upon a few websites where you could easily compile photos into beautiful professional looking book albums. And I found Blurb! A website that not only does the latter, but also allows you to turn your blog entries into books! I happily discovered that WordPress is one of the sites they link up with, so it was a matter of minutes that I uploaded all entries under “Letters to little boy” and “Conversations with little boy” into a book format using the BookSmart software that I downloaded from Blurb. It was really easy peasy! And it was such a joy to relieve some of the sweet memories from little boy’s younger days, and to select photos to go with the blog entries.

The only thing is, since my blog entries were pretty lengthy, I wondered if little boy would read them compiled into a book. After all, he’s not a very avid book reader like I thought he might be (and after reading those old entries, I also realised that I made inaccurate predictions about him growing up to enjoy dangerous activities, and NOT becoming overweight…sigh!). So today, I asked little boy, if I were to give him a birthday present for his 8th birthday, that is a book I wrote with stories about him as a little boy, would he read it. And his answer was, NO! Awww…. so I guess once I complete the book, I would have to save it up as a present for when he is older. Maybe 16, or 18, or even 21? Hmm… I am actually wondering, will he even appreciate the book at any age at all. Maybe after I die, then he would appreciate the book, since it’s filled with my gushing about my love for him. Or maybe when he becomes a father one day. But then this boy doesn’t seem like a very sentimental fella, so I really can’t be sure if he would treasure the book at all. Oh well….

And it is with these thoughts, that after the sudden burst of enthusiasm for this project, that I am feeling a little less eager to complete the book. It is also partially because the text is mostly complete, and I just need to find the suitable photos to accompany the text. So I would have to wait for Mr Gua Gua to dig out the old photos saved up in some hard disk when we moved over from the old house, before I can move onto that step. But honestly, if I felt more confident about little boy enjoying these tales of his childhood one day, I would definitely feel a stronger urge to complete this project.

I think for little girl, I would keep it simpler. Less gushing about how much I love her, and why I do the things I do (honestly, now it just seems like I was making excuses… hope that little boy would not see it that way!), and more of little anecdotes of her daily antics and adventures. And to keep it easier and less time consuming for me, I would definitely need to file them away in an organised manner. I should definitely view more baby albums and see what kind of content seems the most precious and meaningful. There is this one album where it’s just 2 pages for each month in the first year – one page is a photo with a consistent theme, the other page is a list of highlights of that month. I kinda like it cos of it’s simplicity, and that the child would be able to read it in a few years’ time. On the other hand, it is so sparse in detail that I wonder if it would be meaningful enough to the child as an adult. But there is also the overly busy and neverending photos and words of the baby album on the other extreme, the kind that would take 3 hours to read through in detail. Honestly, that really appeals to me too, but I’m not sure if everyone would be patient enough to look through everything. Like the ABC scrapbook I made for little boy, even that one have a good balance of the caption-heavy pages and those with only simple but beautiful layouts, and already, I have a feeling that some people were just flipping through it for the photos and “feel”.

But of cos, I can’t please everyone, and I guess I should just remember that this is mainly for little girl and myself. As long as we love the end result, that should be good enough. The enjoyment of the rest of the family, relatives, friends and even strangers would be a bonus. Ok ok, I have to admit, I love it when people gush over my work. I was super happy when my mum brought the ABC scrapbook to work and her colleagues were all wow-ing over it. 🙂

Ok so for little girl, just short anecdotes, and maybe little poems about her? And include her favourite foods, toys, activities, etc. Actually I was quite impressed and inspired by this baby book that was actually made to look like an educational baby book that taught the body parts, facial expressions, activities, with the child as the “model”. How creative! And it got lots of views. The appeal in this for me is  that it can actually be used as a practical educational book for the growing child, but I don’t think it would be particularly meaningful to the child as an adult, aside from being a sentimental childhood item. A bit like hair from the child’s first haircut, ultrasound pics, the umbilical cord (ugh!), etc – all those knick knacks that have more sentimental value than real meaning. Heh heh, I like to think that even if my love letters to little boy might be a bit long winded, he would perhaps treasure them as an adult. Well, I wish!

Come to think of it, perhaps I’m doing it for my own sake as well. Reading those old entries really made me feel happy cos of the sweet memories they brought back. Wonder if I should also print a 2nd copy for myself to keep. Hmmm….

<Watching Home Alone 2 right now so the multi-tasking may cause this entry to be a bit fragmented… but who cares since no one else is going to be reading this!>

I feel like I need to brush up my skills on photography. I am too lazy to learn about lighting, and in any case, that can be easily improved through photoshop. But I have to take nice clear, and properly framed photos. Preferably with a camera that have that auto focus, with blurred background function. Ok, next up, photography research!

At least that’s better than doing more baby and conception research. Sigh… we had a blackout tonight, and…err… no it didn’t result in a BD session, but it DID result in a talk about BD plans. Or at least BD related stuff. Sigh… not very promising honestly. But how could I nag or whine too much about it right? It’s not going to help with creating the atmosphere for BDing. But honestly, at this point, I would even settle with just injecting the armies into where they need to be, if that’s going to help little girl to come. Haha… should I tell Mr Gua Gua that or would that just make things even worse? 😛

Anyway, it just feels like things are in limbo now. We are not exactly financially ready for little girl to come at this point either, as Mr Gua Gua is still in the midst of finding a new job and he hates his current one so things aren’t very stable, especially with all the income tax that he needs to pay. As for me, assuming that Monika’s FC-TC goes on as planned, then it won’t be feasible for little girl to come now cos I won’t be able to complete the training.

Perhaps I’m just fretting over nothing. What’s meant to be will come right? Hmm…maybe i’m just really bored now so I feel like having a baby to take care of. I’m sure I’m not the only person to feel this way, but it doesn’t seem like such a good  idea. After all, I remember having the bored moments when little boy was a baby too. But maybe this time I can find some fellow mummies to mingle with. Though I would have to get over my antisocial feeling first. It’s hard for me to feel chatty these days, except with Mr Gua Gua. Hmm…. hopefully the Emotion Code session with Monika on 29/7 would help somewhat for that.

Gosh… XX’s videos and photos of her boy are just the cutest. Reminder to myself: MUST TAKE MORE PHOTOS AND VIDEOS OF LITTLE GIRL IN FUTURE!!!

Just another day in my bizarre family life

August 24, 2009 at 10:54 am | Posted in All about little boy, Conversations with little boy, Happy moments | Leave a comment

This entry has been slightly modified to save someone’s face.

Scene of crime: Kitchen

Upon stepping out of the bathroom, I saw a *hairband* shoved behind a pail. The  same *hairband* that I threw into the dustbin days ago cos it was spoiled, and I even pushed it right in the bottom cos i knew someone would pounced on it and “rescue” the hairband.

“GUA GUA!!!!”

The frog comes bouncing in, knowing he got caught. Again.


The frog flinched, looking guilty and sheepish, as I stared at him with arms on my hips, with no intention of letting him off without a huge scolding.

Just then, the bathroom door clanked open, and little boy who was in the bathroom finishing up his bath (or more like playing with water) looked at me with wide open eyes.


And he just kept looking at us, not understanding why we laughed so hard. Since we were too busy laughing our heads off, he asked again, “The fish eat your *hairband*, IS IT?”

Thanks to little boy, the frog was saved from a big lecture on picking up things from the dustbin and hiding them.

And that’s just another day in my bizarre (but funny) family life.

Another story…

Few days back, I made fresh orange juice for him which he liked very much and served it to him in his little plastic cup that looked like a champagne cup, with a stem. It has been used for weeks, and i’m not sure when part of the base got broken, but I used it anyway.

So he went “Thank you Mee Mee” very sweetly, and I replied “You’re welcome Ian”.

(Btw, little boy is ultra polite especially with me, and says his thank yous, pleases, and welcomes wonderfully whenever he’s with me. Mind you, not because he’s afraid of me (which would be Mr Gua Gua’s hypothesis). I would like to think it’s because he models after me, and of cos, he loves my approval.)

As I was walking back to the kitchen, little boy noticed the broken part of the base, and he said “Mee mee, this cup broken! Did you step on it?”

“Yes…” Actually I didn’t, but it was easier to say yes than to explain what happened to the cup, which I didn’t know either.

“Need plaster…” I thought he wanted to scotch tape the cup. “…for your leg?”

Awww… and i went back to assure him that i didn’t step on the cup, and don’t need the plaster.

My sweet sweet little boy… 🙂

Aura scan

April 8, 2009 at 12:30 am | Posted in All about little boy, The journey within | Leave a comment

As little boy is staying at my in laws’ place these days (his idea), our time together has become all the more precious. I really appreciate this arrangement, because it seems like i make better use of my time now, whether it is on myself or when i’m with little boy. Each moment is well spent, and fully appreciated.

Last Sun, the three of us went to Chinatown. I had the impulse to take an aura scan for myself and for little boy. When we reached, i told little boy we were going to take special photographs, pointing to him the sample pics on display. He was going, “my first, my first!”, which is his way of saying that he wanted to be first. But we easily convinced him to watch how i did mine.

When it was his turn, Mr Gua Gua adjusted his hands on the metal plates. Since his hands were so small, he could only touch 3 of the metal fingers. And throughout the whole 1 minute or so, he was sitting there obediently, with his whole body slouched forward, eyes rolling from side to side, and mouth wide open in the most funny way. 

I was amazed by little boy’s aura pic. It’s totally violet, with a shimmer of white around his head, which the lady said represented some protective energy. The analysis that comes with the aura scan said that little boy is truly a child of the new age, and would be a spiritual leader, which confirmed what we knew all along.

Mine was pretty satisfactory, with qualities of peace and healing in the aura. Of cos, it does thrill me to know that i am a “natural healer, counsellor and teacher”, since these are what i plan to be doing more of in the near future, perhaps for the rest of my life.

Yet, the more i dvelve into this healing arena, reading and experience more of it, i realise that there is a healer in all of us. Once we are freed from ignorance and delusions, we all have the power to heal ourselves and others.

Like someone just recently mentioned to me, we are all a conduit. A vessel, for facilitation of the healing.

Last Sat a friend called me to complain about his work situation. He can be overly immersed in his negativity and fear at times, and i used to listen to him and feel helpless in not knowing what to say to get him out of the negativity, at the same time, feeling ashamed that i don’t seem to be able to help him.

In this phone conversation, i just decided to do surrogate tapping as i listened to him, as well as visualise my friend being surrounded by white light. In a way, doing these two things, unbeknownst to my friend, gave me the space to truly listen to him. At the same time, i wasn’t really listening to the details of his story. More of the confusion and frustration that i heard in his voice, and at the same time, maintaining the faith i had in him, that he was actually a wise being who is momentarily disconnected from that wisdom.

He asked me for advice 3 times. All 3 times, i asked him to focus on that issue he was asking advice for, and to note any thoughts and feelings that came up. This was the first time i asked someone to do this, though i probably in a way copied it from The Journey. Apparently this helped, cos all 3 times, my friend intuited a way of handling or looking at that issue that helped him find his way through his confusion.

To me, it’s a very beautiful and relaxing way of “helping” someone. I don’t need to give anyone any answers or advice or “words of wisdom”. It was simply about holding the space and helping that person be reminded of his or her own divine wisdom.

That’s why i love being in the helper role. The helper role brings out my qualities of wisdom, groundedness, compassion and detachment. Qualities that i sometimes lose touch with when playing other roles in my life. This is why i love going to work. Work provides ME with the space to manifest my true beingness.

Well, in a way, the whole of life can provide me with the opportunities to move into my beingness… it’s just that non-work areas are a lot more challenging, and sometimes unpleasant. Whereas when i’m playing the helper role, i shift into my most enlightened state of being. My workplace is literally my heaven/haven.

That’s why i’m grateful for having clients. They don’t just bring in the cash. They give me the chance to access the riches that are already within me.

Today i went to the hospital to visit a cousin who was seriously ill, though thankfully getting better. It was a single bedder, and since there was only my mum around, i started doing surrogate tapping and chanting for him. Once again, while my intention may be to do it for him, i certainly benefitted as well. I’m not sure how much benefits it brought to my cousin. He was smiling at certain points, and my mum was asking him why he was smiling but he didn’t/couldn’t reply. Well… i certainly hope that what i did today was able to assist him in his healing to some extent.

If this is a form of healing that really helps, i wldn’t mind doing it for pple on a regular basis. It just feels so natural and so right.

Well, guess the universe already got it all planned out for me in some way. Just gotta let go and trust the process as usual.

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